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No, I’m not talking about slutty schoolgirl over-the-knee socks with teency plaid skirts. I’m not talking about Fook Mi and Fook Yu. Twins, Bazzle! But no, that’s not what I mean. Fook Mi and Fook Yu are a classic example of knee highs gone slutty, AKA wrong. Keep reading for edgy, trendy, borderline hipster but still super-cool-but-not-nerdy ways to rock the knee high. Your mom will not call you a hooker, I promise. Unless you live with an extremely religious Mormon or nun. Sorry if this offended you. I urge you to read on.

First way to rock the knee high? Classy and 90’s chic. Need inspiration? Just turn to Cher. You don’t think she looks cute? AS IF! Her high tech 1995 closet picked out her outfit for her, socks and all. Soak it in. You’ll never be as cool, rich, or popular she Cher was in high school. You’re just like, SO clueless.

Okay, fine. You’re not into those metallic silver Mary Jane flats? Whatever. Let’s move on.

Next option: daytime knee high. Pair your darker knee highs with some vintage cut off jean shorts to look instantly cool, calm, collected, and borderline Shop Nasty Gal chic.

Throw on a slouchy sweater and a big bag to complete the look. Maybe even forget to wash or brush your hair to look extra Lower-East-Side Fabulous. Who knows, you could be the next fashionista in the Village. So “How to Make it in America”-esque. RIP Ben Greenstein.

Okay, now shoes. Take those dark knee highs and throw on a pair of chunky wedges of the same color. Check out how Megan Fox does it. She’s a little more casual, but still… She got to kiss Shia while fighting evil robot alien transformers. Rude. But so hot.

Want to take your extra long socks from day to night? I found this super tall blonde babe lookin’ hot on the streets of NYC with two options.

First: black knee highs with converse and a jean jacket, and an edgy backpack. Ugh that hat. She’s cool. Who is she? Definitely not on her way to school though.

Second: Swap out the Converse for some black chunky wedges, the jean jacket for a leather one, and the backpack for a purse. Keep the slouchy hat, throw on some dark liquid eyeliner and you’re ready to go. If it’s cold out, put on some sheer black tights underneath your knee highs to stay warm, look dressier, and take it to the next level of diva chic.

And to end on an extra special idea, grab some printed knee highs like these ones and wear a shoe that matches. Jeffrey Campbell shoes are definitely the best chunky, comfy shoe around and go to knee highs like the Kardashians to black guys.

Scared this look is just not for you? I swear normal people not from NYC or LA do it. I wore it to Exo (ha, trashy) and got so many compliments. Try it out. Just make sure I’m not wearing mine the same night…

Everyone say hi to Leora AKA Lala.

Okay, bye.